Thursday, October 25, 2007

I'm leaving on a Jet Plane...

So tomorrow we leave for the Big Apple. 4 days of fun, frolicking, booze, and women....oh wait, that's the Boss's trip....

So here's the plan so far: Leave tomorrow a.m. at the butt-crack of dawn. Yeah. We have to be at the Commune in Grapevine by 7 so that a) my sister can take my car to work and b) we'll be there when the shuttle arrives. Why is my sister taking my car to work? Well, because her car is a heap of...well, we'll just call it a heap, and in the spring she'll be replacing it. She thinks with a car like mine. So while we're gone she'll be test driving mine. She has two rules: I want gas in it when I get back and I want no trash left in it. I took out all of my cds because she has a habit of "borrowing" them and then misplacing them. Not Cool. I might slide in a copy of my Lilly Allen, though, because I bought it on itunes and can always burn another.

Saturday we'll be laying about the hotel rooms - maybe a trip up to the Hamptons where I'll don a snooty accent and pretend that I hate everything. (pretend...?) Followed by MASS (at which I'll be struck by lightening. If this happens, know that I love you. And there's no more pot hidden in my house. You could look, but it would be fruitless. Unless you have a thing for catnip.) Mass is followed by fancy dinner celebrating the 65th wedding anniversary of the grandparents-in-law. Awesome. If we hit 65 then I'll be 102. I'd like to think I'll live that long. If I don't get struck down upon entering the church, that is.

Sunday we're having drunken brunch (well, I'm having sober brunch) and meandering about the city with R and E, who live in Jersey now. Steve lost his sunglasses, so we'll probably replace them with some street-bought Farmanis or Prados or something. I also wouldn't mind a Shermes Birkin...if we happen to run across one. I'd take a Kelly if I needed to.

Monday we fly back and come home to some snotty cats who will ignore us for a day just out of spite.

Whining: My scrapbook store is closing! Recollections. Because some Canadians bought Michaels and are utterly clueless. I'm going to write an angry letter. I enjoy the scrapbook store. And I *hate* Michaels. There aren't words for how much I will not be patronizing a michaels just because they shut down their specialty store. blargh.

Question: is it wrong of me to be vaguely relieved that I didn't get knocked up this year? As odds go I would have had a boy (most of the pregnant people I know are having/have recently had boys - with a couple of girls thrown in. Speaking with friends I know that this is fairly widespread...) I'm partial to girls, though. Hey- if I wait a couple of year we can the in-vitro where you pick the gender. Gattica, here I come!

Ok...I really should be packing. Motivation, please...?

Also - I have this song in my head. So I found the video. I love the song - and I'm totally digging the Fosse Dance Breaks. Makes me want to dance. Wonder if I'm cleared for that....?

Saturday, October 20, 2007


I just serenaded Husband with the theme song from Cheers.

You know you're jealous.

Gettin' things accomplished :-)

I updated the googlepage a bit. With the park pictures. I can't tell you how glad I'll be when the construction is finished that it happened so quickly because they worked 24/7...literally. But right now I'm wishing they'd take a day off for goodness sake.

So follow the link if you're interested:

I haven't uploaded the pumpkin patch pictures yet because I downloaded an editing program called Pixelmator and I'm learning how to use it. So once those photos are tweaked to my satisfaction they'll go up. In the meantime I'm enjoying all the little gadgets it comes with.

I did reference a song on the construction page: Secret Meeting by the National. I tried to find a decent video to embed so you could enjoy it if you've never heard it, but the sound was atrocious. So....moving on.

I was talking with a friend of mine about why I read so many Young Adult Books (I'm currently reading the second novel in the Private series by Kate Brian: Invitation Only) and Murder Mystery/ Suspense Novels. I'll occasionally pick up Chick Lit, but only if it has nothing to do with her trials and tribulations as she tries to find love. I think it's because I burned out after so many Bridget Jones clones. The murder mysteries and suspense novels I like for obvious reasons: I'm completely morbid, I like puzzles, and there are little-to-no vapid, simpering beauties convinced that they're going to get the hot guy only to end up hooking up with the guy they'd always considered a friend in the end. :-D The young adult books I like because they, too, are so infrequently about romance. Yes there are relationships, and yes they are often intense because at 16 (or 14 or 18) it is always true love and the are always complicated. Nobody in the books I read is wondering if they can get pregnant, pay the bills, find a job, etc. All of the mundane things that plague adult life are gone and replaced with sneaking out after curfew, taking over the world, thwarting an evil master plan....they have more possibility. They aren't chained to reality or a pre-ordained notion of what Adult Fantasy should look like.

My next, next novel will be a young adult novel. (My next novel involves skateboards and pyrotechnics...I'm still researching it.) I've already got the characters.

Speaking of novels...Where, you ask, is the progress on my recently completed and revised novel? I'm paralized at Query Letter. What they ask for: Title, Genre, Word Count, Brief Description of Story, Brief biography of me. Um...Title: Putting The Damage On (working title, there might be copyright issues with Ms Amos), Genre: Mystery/Suspense, Word Count: 33,769 (which is shy of what they consider but I'm sure with the re-writes that are still forthcoming I'll push over the top). It's the brief descriptions that are stopping me. I'm going to work on it on the plane to/from New York next week. In between reading Deluxe: How Luxury Lost its Luster - non fiction. The graphic on the front is a McDonalds Combo Meal wrapped in Prada logos. It's considered a must read for anyone in fashion, finance, marketing, or luxury industries. I consider it educational.

And now it's 11 am on a saturday morning. Laundry is in process, website updated. Blog updated. Next on my list is mopping or organizing my closet to pull out my Fall But Not Winter Clothes....neither one is appealing. Hm. There must be something I can do...

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Insert Clever Blog Name Here

I just got back from Neimans. I wandered down to pick up a little gift for a cousin who's expecting a baby girl (out of the four pregnant women I know, two are having girls and two are having boys -- but one of those women is having twin boys so they're in the majority) and to pick up a cami to wear under my wrap dress so that I stay decent at dinner.

It's their 100th anniversary and they've got exhibits all over the store. And not just fashion - although the first floor seems dedicated to that. Up on the children's level (floor 1.5) they have a furniture exhibit, including a badass lego chair and a carved wood table - the wood carvings are tadpole to frog and *very* cool. Words fail me. Floor 3 has a shadow art exhibit - mangled wires reveal turns outlines of recognizable shapes when the spotlight hits them. Floor 4 has bedazzled walls - something I'm going to employ in the next child's room I get to do. Floor 5 has a Jetsons exhibit.

I'd forgotten that they lived in the 21st century. In houses up in the clouds with flying cars and robot companions. I'd like a robot companion. The exhibit is cool - clips of the cartoon are showing and there are plexi boxes with "Jetsons, then and now" displays. Example: robot floor cleaner = roomba. Worth a look if you're in the neighborhood before November 3rd.

And if you are in the neighborhood you should call me. Unless it's next weekend, because then I'll be in New York.

The night before the Christmas Parade (Dec 1 at 10 am) the twins and bubble are coming to spend the night like they did last year. Unlike last year they're staying until Sunday morning. We felt rushed last year so this year we're going to kick back and take it a little slower. I have a feeling I'll be renting High School Musical 2.

Speaking of - High School Musical On Ice is coming to AAC at the end of march. The twins turn 13 in March. Guess what I'll be doing that last sunday? Freezing my ass off watching high school kids be melodramatic. Whoopie!

There was something else I wanted to document, but I can't remember what it is...I'm sure it'll come to me...eventually...

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

I completely forgot to blog yesterday.

Yesterday was blog action day -- and the topic was the environment. What's Blog Action Day? you ask...well, it's one day a year when everyone who blogs is supposed to write on the same subject. To promote brotherhood or some such nonsense. But it's blogging about the environment and you'd think I'd be all over that.

Except that these drugs I'm on make me vague, easily distracted, and frustrated. (don't worry, will be calling the dr today to see if I can switch. I'd be better off on pot. For reals.)

So I'm going to blog really quickly (at 6:50 am on TUESDAY - a day late, sorry) about how saving the world has become so trendy. Not that I'm bothered by the trendiness - a little awareness here, a little action there...and voila- you've got some habits that stick and we're cutting down fewer trees, having access to more sources of healthy water, and hopefully preventing the death by drowning of several thousand polar bears who don't understand what's happening to their home. Seriously - I've always been sad about things like Deer and rabbits and squirrels whose homes have been demo'd in the interested of the newest suburban sprawl (and we all know how I feel about sprawl...) but the thought of polar bears drowning because their home is melting makes me want to cry.

One thing that does bug me: I've been a "Take my own bag" girl for years. My mom was a "take my own bag" woman for years before that. It seemed like the thing to do - she goes to the ALA conference, gets a boat load of canvas totes and instead of leaving them in the closet to take up space and collect dust - she leaves them in her trunk to carry bread, cheese, etc in. No plastic or paper pile up at her house, either. Because hauling plastic bags back to the store to be recycled was something we always forgot. We'd get to the store, see the bin, and smack ourselves on the forehead. Taking our own bags became habit before the city started curbside recycling.

I have a ton of bags picked up from various locations - ALA conferences, container store, the grocery in Dusseldorf where you have to buy your own bag - plastic or canvas and I thought "Badass souvenir! Canvas please.. four of them, since they're only $0.25E!" And I drag those with me everywhere. Will actually be taking them to the butcher today.

And then some genius thought up the idea for this:

And suddenly taking your own bag is popular because it makes a statement that the world can see. So those of us who have been quietly taking our own bags to whole foods and the farmers market and the butcher, etc, seem...passe? for not having a cool bag... Or we're seen as slobs because Yes, I have seen this bag. At Central Market. Being carried by a glamozon with perfect hair, makeup, heels, skinny jeans, and a humongous rock (probably from some questionable mine in Africa).

I'm either jealous that I didn't think of it or pissed that it trivializes what is actually a very environmentally-impactful gesture (how many of these bags will be collecting dust in the closet in a few seasons? I'd wager over %60)

And then I saw this:

That's a bag I'd buy. I'd probably get double the "brought my own bag" discount at my Whole Foods. Or maybe I'm just bitter ;-)

Shower time! (oooh -- and the coffee's ready...)

Thursday, October 11, 2007

The Happiest Of Hours

Have added a Happy Hour page to the googlepage. Click the link at right, click on outings, and then, obviously, Happy Hour.

There was some tomfoolery. And a bit of shenanigans. No debauchery last night, but this is a weekly thing.... ;-)

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Check Please.

I'd like to explode my body and start over. Anyone know of a good body shop?

Thanks :-)

ok - short blog. Have an educational video courtesy of the Chemical Brothers: (this one isn't edited for language, so be aware)

Monday, October 8, 2007

Le Weekend...

Updated the googlepage with pics from Bubble's birthday party - click the link at left, follow the party pics!

That was Saturday night. It was fun. I feel like the twins are getting older and I'm staying the same age. Sister says that's because we're beginning to have more in common. I think it's because they're destined to be the Cool Kids and I'm destined to be perpetually 17 in my mind. I'm ok with that.

Sunday was a baby shower. For the Big Taquita. It was fun. Nice to see my friends that I didn't get to see while I was sick. It's amazing how much happens in a month. It's nice to be on my feet again.

Anyway - I mostly just wanted to let you know I updated the page with some photos. This Saturday coming up I'm taking Bubble and The Twins pumpkin picking. There will be lots of photos there :-)

Happy Monday!

Sunday, October 7, 2007


I read the Essay in this weeks (Well, October 15th's) Time. It's written by Joel Stein and titled "You Are Not My Friend" Subtitled: "Yes, we're on Facebook. But I don't care about your cat. And stop poking me."

I don't normally read Time. We were awarded a free subscription when I ordered the totes I gave my bridesmaids and - like a Cosmo subscription awarded at the same time - it Won't Go Away. If there's a good cover story, or I'm really bored, I'll flip through it. It was the title of this Essay that got me, as I have recently ceased the majority of my activity on Myspace. (see first blogpot blog for full story)

He makes a good point - saying that people who would have originally been just friends of friends would suddenly, upon "adding him" become great friends pushing pictures of their new living room set and their cat's fifth birthday party on him.

He also notes that these sites aren't really an invasion of privacy (as older generations fear that they are) because we're not posting or sharing anything we don't want the world to know about. He says:
"We're showing you our best posed, retouched photos. We're listing Pynchon books we want you to think we've read all the way through. We're allowing other people to write whatever they want about us on our walls, unless we don't like it, in which case we'll just erase it. If we had that much privacy in real life, the bathrooms at that Minnesota airport would be empty."

All of this is true. Look through the myspace pictures and the blogs. Everyone is happy, everyone is in love...except those people who have to have something wrong with them to get attention. You know those people - they're always injured, poor, sad, achy, tired, grumpy, just-been-fucked-over...or they're the people who have to be More Than everyone else: happier, sadder, in more pain, cooler, have better names to drop: you know them. They're the Competition Whores.

So I'm not going to do any of that. I'm going to make a conscious effort to not shield any of my self. I'll write what comes into my head. Stream of consciousness. And if you don't like what you read...nobody's forcing you. I'm pretending that you don't, anyway. We're more honest when we're by ourselves. That's when we crank up Barbie Girl and sing into our hair brushes.

For reals.

So now I'm going to stop blogging and go to iphoto and adjust the photos I took at Bubble's 9th birthday party last night. I might do a bit of imovie, too...but I'm a little intimidated.

Oh yeah - that's the other thing I'm going to do. With the exception of my husband (and my cats ;-) ), if I talk about someone I will use a nickname. If you're In The Know then a) you probably are aware of the situation in the first place and b) can figure it out on your own. If not...sorry.


Friday, October 5, 2007


I was at Target and I bought the new Harper's Bazaar just because Mary Kate Olsen is on the cover.

I watched Gossip Girl and painted my nails vamp after work. Then I scoured the internet for the hat that Serena was wearing in the last scene of the episode. To no avail, alas...

I couldn't even make it through the first 15 minutes of RENT. I don't care if Taye Diggs is hot.

Scarlett Johansen (sp?) does nothing for me. I see the appeal, but she's not my type.

I have the Devil Wears Prada almost memorized and yet I still watch it whenever I'm having a case of the Fargos. I will probably own the Gossip Girl series on DVD and the same will apply to that.

We have too much furniture.

I am as shallow as a kiddie pool (although I guess that's not news...)

While I do have Bill Clinton's new book (Giving) and a book about the downfall of luxury on hold at the library, I also have the new Gossip Girl and the new Scott Westerfeld on hold. I might still be a 17 year old kid, for all we know.

I had a dream last night and my little brothers were in it. It ended the way it ended in real life - with me not talking to them anymore. I've been dreaming a lot about people I don't talk to anymore lately. Maybe it's got something to do with the swelling - my short term memory is shit, but my subconscious keeps pulling up things I've buried and playing them for me in my dreams. Seriously - it's weird. And some of them are cathartic and when it ends it feels final and I'm ok with it when I wake up, but some of them make me want to give that person a call. Not like I'd even know where to begin to find their numbers. Or what I would say. Can you imagine? "Hi, I almost died and I had a dream about you while my brain was still swollen so I thought I'd call you up and see how you are. How are you?" There's no PC response to that. I imagine a lot of awkward silences.

I haven't written my query letter yet. All of a sudden Steve is all about reading and revising and if I've got another round to do, I'd like to do it before I start pimping it out.

I'm going to use the storyboard feature that I found in one of my iwork programs to layout my next novel. I've got the soundtrack all planned. And I even know what the climax will be. It hit me in the car today. Remember the scene from Scream where Lars Ulrich (hottie) and the other guy are telling what's her face their plan and they say "Everyone Dies But Us" over and over - it was sortof like that, except that's not my climactic point. I'm not telling you my climactic point, you'll just have to read it.

I've decided my 3rd book is going to focus on high school kids. Might as well put all this researchy stuff (ok - obsession) to good use. And by the time I get to book 3 the Twins will be freshmen and I can pick their brains. I look forward to it.

Ok - have to go finish my Bazaar and do something about dinner.


just some stuff that's bouncing around in my head

First off, I seem to be on the cosmic radar lately. I won the lottery and picked up the virus that stole over a month of my life. And then I receive not great news about a mole that was removed -- which sent me on a sunscreen rampage. It's a good excuse to buy hats. Cute ones with floppy brims. :-) And now I'm going to come out and say that Steve and I have been trying to expand our family since March. Don't worry- Emily's not getting a baby for Christmas this year. I've been told to wait - until my body is healed. Until the drugs are out of my system. Until sometime early next year. Who knows when we'll start up again. At least I have a nephew on the way.

I wandered around Northpark yesterday after picking up Christmas cards for the company (do it now while it's on my mind and before all the good ones are gone, right?) and I went in and out of baby stores. Unfortunately, I think my sense of humor would scandalize - or at least not appeal to - my brother and sister in law. I *know* it would scandalize my mother in law.

On a funnier note - we got a card in the mail the other day saying that a 21 year old sex offender had moved into our building. Reading the card we discovered that his crime was compelling prostitution. He got a 7 year sentence and is on probation. Steve and I were very amused at the thought of a pimp living in our building. In my mind I crossed the guy from the Motorcycle Diaries with Austin Powers and then placed him in our building. It's still and amusing mental image. Then we read a little further and saw that his victim was 13. Not Funny Anymore. Then we got a letter from the Powers the Run Our Building saying that he does NOT live in our building - he registered a false address and is now considered a Wanted Felon. Niiiice.

There's more up in my head, but I need to call my optometrist and Steve's Dermatologist and then I need to ice some cookies.

Happy Weekend!

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Wear Sunscreen

Visited the doctor yesterday and got a bummer of an update: no booze until after the holidays (likely) because I'm on drugs until then. Yippie! But I'm improving.

Also, I had a mole removed in august and instead of me preaching to you, I'll let Baz Lurhmann do it: (there's some controversy over who wrote this speech - according to snopes it was written in 97 by a Chicago Tribune columnist named Mary Schmich and made its way around from that. It's some Australian guy named Lee Perry who's speaking.) Oh, and it's got Spanish subtitles if you're so inclined :-)

edit: I don't know why it embedded twice but not the code is all the way gone from my text box so I'm not sure how to delete one of them....

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

By George, I've got it!

I figured out the name. It came to me while reading Slummy Mummy in the bath last night. (a fun little read about a mom who's not yummy or totally put together, she's not harried because she works full time, she's just a little more scatterbrained than your average mom and she's not really ashamed of it -- most of the time. It's fun.)

Anyway, back to the important topic: the novel has a name. Are you ready? Drumroll, please....

Putting The Damage On
A Novel

By Emily B. (I'm considering using an ancestral surname in the interest keeping stalkers from finding me and allowing my cult-following type fans to pronounce my pen name...all the cool kids are doing it...)

There's a nice double entendre in the name - if you've read it you'll understand. ;-)

I'll leave you with Tori Amos performing her song of the same name (which has nothing to do with my novel) live:

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

What's in a name...

this is hard. I'm having such a hard time naming my novel...and I know what it's all here's some brainstorming:

Scope of Death (which sounds like a B movie now that I say it in my head)
Through the Zoom Lens

Why am I feeling like all the good names are taken? Let's see...photographer, wedding planner, pre-vet student, mysterious death, small town, missing corpses, grave robbery...

Picture Perfect Corpse
Framing the Corpse
A View to a Kill (taken. by James Bond. Told you all the good ones were taken.)
Contact (taken.)

Well...I guess it'll come to me at like 3am or something. This is really holding me up. I feel all stagnate. Perhaps I should go do some laundry.

Monday, October 1, 2007

Oh bloody hell...

I need a title before I can start querying. And my brain is still swollen.

This could take some time.

Suggestions? Here's my synopsis again: Molly, a globe-trotting photojournalist has just returned to her twin sister Marti's home in Dallas when they are visited by their niece, Nelle, who brings news of a tractor accident which has killer her parents. Mourning the loss of their brother and sister-in-law, Molly and Marti take Nelle to the family farm in the Texas Hill Country with the intention of getting everyone's lives back on track. They are met with the mysterious circumstances surrounding the accident. To Molly's chagrin and at Nelle's insistence, they investigate their small town and neighbors in an attempt to determine beyond a reasonable doubt just who or what was responsible for the accident.

yeesh....just when you think you've turned a corner....

Money everyone

In the interest of saving our pennies for a mortgage downpayment (and other large bills anyone? Seriously, just let me know if you want one and I will make sure one comes your way. We've got plenty to go around.) I hopped on a money chat board and asked if there was some place I'm overlooking to shave expenses.

And the thing is - if there's one, I don't know what it is and neither do they. For all their good intentions, that group of women focuses very much on how inexpensive something is over how well made it is - or how good it is for you. I'm sure if I searched back months they would all be tossing recalled food because they bought cheap instead of smart. There's an entire thread dedicated to the cheapest place to buy pet food. I'm all for saving money and not over-spending, but I'm not giving my cats (my only babies for now) cheap food. I won't eat it - why should they?

Anyway - we're going to be more diligent about how we spend our money and where and when. If you've got tips (Aside from- buy whatever is on sale...regardless of brand) I'm happy to hear them.

And for the record...a lot of the things I do to save the planet also save us money. Using rags instead of paper towels, for example: less paper towels we buy, which means less trees used in the production, less oil in the shipping, blah blah blah......

This is one of those subjects people don't like to talk about at parties. It's TABOO. Much like income and plastic surgery. Well, the way plastic surgery used to be. Now people throw parties and glorify it. It's truly scary.

I'm about to start sending out queries. I feel that I've done all I can on my own (and with the help from my friends) and I'm chomping at the bit to start getting rejections in the mail. Any tips on that one will be nice, also. Here's hoping for a contract...!

A parting tip: squirrels don't have lots of nuts because they make lots of nuts. They have them because they SAVE lots of nuts.... ;-)