Thursday, August 13, 2009

Baby. Daddy.

So I went to Chili's To Go for lunch today because I drove by it on my way home from Michaels (relatively unsuccessful trip) and thought "that grilled Caribbean salad sound mighty tasty right about now..." so I pull a vaguely illegal uturn and backtrack only to find out that not only is it not on the menu, but they can't even pretend it is and rig one together for me. Oh...honey lime dressing, how I'll miss you...

So I order chicken crispers (meh) and spinach artichoke dip (for later) and as I'm sitting waiting for them to make fresh chicken strips and old fries the little girl behind the register and I start chatting.

By little girl, of course, I mean she was probably around my age.

her: "'s your day been?"

me: "About like this, but I'm out of the house so it's good!"

her: "Yeah, my car was in the shop last week and I was stuck at home and it just got to be too much."

me: "I hear ya. You have to get out. I think I've watched every dvd we own." (I have. Twice. And all of the special extras because I like the 2-disc versions. Thankfully there's netflix and streaming interwebs)

her: "Do you not have cable?"

me: "No...." and I think, what kind of weird shut-in does she think I am? So then I add "I'm pregnant, and so I'm really tired, so I've spent the past couple of months holding down the couch." No one wants to hear that by "holding down the couch" you mean "not being able to hold down lunch." Certainly not when you've just ordered the greasiest lunch you've had in months. I go on to say, so brilliantly: "Plus, if you're watching something you've seen a million times it doesn't matter if you sleep through half of it."

Yes. I am that lame.

So then she says: "Wow, how far along are you?"

Me: "about 4 and a half months, not that you can tell."

Her: "My best friend is about 6 months pregnant and she's still got a tiny little bump, but she spends a lot of time laying on the couch and we just bring her food." I nod knowingly.

Then she says, very hesitantly: "So do you live with your father - I mean, the"

Me: "My husband. Yes." And then it's like this huge flood of relief (and I realize I had my hands behind my back because I'd been pulling up my still-too-big maternity jeans and she couldn't see the rings.)

She is now effusive: "That's so great! And so exciting! Wonderful!" Tripping over herself.

My question - if you're worried that the answer to the question you want to ask a total stranger is going to make any interaction after that uncomfortable...maybe you shouldn't ask it in the first place.

Just Sayin'.

Then they brought out my food, she wished me luck, I told her to have a nice day, and I came home and watched the commentary for Bewitched.


Amy said...

How weird. I don't think it said too much for her asking that, maybe everyone she knows that is pregnant has been so out of wedlock? What a dumb question to ask.

♥ ♥ ♥ said...

Oh dear, sweet baby Jesus I wish I could have been there to witness that exchange of awkwardness!!!